With new opportunity comes the ability to mess up big time.

[TheKarazyvicePresidentRR]

As I stated in my praise thread I have the opportunity to move in with my friend free of charge, issue is, truth be told, this will be me moving from my family for the first time and thats scary. I also happen to watch my brother and sister a lot (To the point I call them "the kids" rather than my bro and sister) and have since I was 15-ish. So that'd be another major life change. I'm also worried that the kids may become "wild kids" without me. Just there is a TON of stuff to think on and I really want God to guide me. Please pray for guidance and I would LOVE to get any advice you have.

[lightningninja]

The kids will probably be alright without you, it's not for long. If YOU are okay going and YOU want to go to nationals, go for it. God has obviously opened the way thus far. He'll take care of the kids for a week. 

[Rawrlolsauce!]

The kids will probably be alright without you, it's not for long. If YOU are okay going and YOU want to go to nationals, go for it. God has obviously opened the way thus far. He'll take care of the kids for a week. 

Someone didn't read the thread 

[TheKarazyvicePresidentRR]

The kids will probably be alright without you, it's not for long. If YOU are okay going and YOU want to go to nationals, go for it. God has obviously opened the way thus far. He'll take care of the kids for a week. 

Naw, I know they'll be fine with nationals. The move would be after summer during the school year.

[YourMathTeacher]

Rebecca and I know the situation, and we will be praying for you and your family.

[Prof Underwood]

The following are the thoughts that came into my head regarding this situation, and so I share them.  Remember that I love you as a Christian brother

I think there are many good reasons for someone to leave their families as they grow up.  There are negative ones (like escaping abuse) and positive ones (like getting married, or just establishing mature independence).  However, this situation that you describe (living for free with a friend) doesn't actually sound like a positive one.  You can live for free with you family, and that works long-term because they're family.  There is a love and responsibility there that can't be broken.

However, friends don't share that same love and responsibility.  There can be strong bonds of friendship, but they still aren't the same as family.  Living with someone ALWAYS creates conflict.  They have different rules in their house than you're used to.  They have different habitual ways of doing things that annoy you (and vice-versa).  There will be times when just the logistics of an extra person in the house will get in the way of plans.  There are extra expenses.  Etc.  When you are family all of this can be dealt with constructively or even be overlooked if necessary.  But when it's just friendship, this can often lead to a lot of strain in the long-run.  You see this happen a lot when people who are best friends in HS decide to be roommates in college.  Often it ends very poorly.

Now I'm not saying this can't work for you.  And I don't know all the details, which might have led me in a very different direction.  But I do think that these are some things that you should at least consider as you pray and make your decision.

[YourMathTeacher]

There are definitely more details than the good professor is aware of, but my question is how far away is this friend? How much contact with your family are you expecting after the move?

You need to eventually make decisions for your own future. That may still include your family, and the many sacrifices that you have made for them. Your brother loves you dearly, but he will need to gain independence and maturity on his own as a teenager. Ultimately, the responsibility for your siblings falls on your parents, not you. You have done so much for them, and I know they appreciate it. But you can not let your life pass by you without pursuing your own dreams, with God's leading. It's so easy to get caught up in the "just one more year," "just until he's such and such age," "just until we get into a new place" mentality, but there will always be a "good" reason to stay in your current situation.

I do agree with the Professor's synopsis of life with roommates, but life with my family when I was your age was much worse than any roommate I ever had. Some family situations require respite, and even removal. You may try the roommate thing and decide to just go back to your family. I'm sure they will be happy to have you back.

Love is sacrifice, so this may still be your time to love your family because they need you. I can only offer advice based on what I already know about your situation, and what I have experienced. My move to Florida was my "removal" from my family in New England, which at the time was a "removal" from my wife's family in Virginia Beach. We felt that it was time to make decisions for our own lives, and we have felt blessed ever since. There is only so much you can do before it is simply time to move on. Both of our families still talk to us and love us. Sure there were difficult days immediately after each move, but time heals many wounds and they are all happy for us now.

You have diligently served your family for so many years. I think you need some Josh time.

[BubbleBoy]

So far, everyone seems to be giving you advice on how you should decide what to do for yourself. My advice would be to find out what God wants you to do for Him and make your decision accordingly. Just sayin'.

I'll pray for you, too.

[YourMathTeacher]

Just sayin'.

Holier than Thou cheapshots. Just sayin'.

[soul seeker]

Please pray for guidance and I would LOVE to get any advice you have.

Peace friends.  He's asked for both.  I'm sure RR appreciates the advice from two Godly men, and understands that they don't necessarily have the full picture.  However, with the info he gave, he still requested advice and he is also seeking God's leading. per this quote:

and I really want God to guide me.

God can use Godly men and their advice to help make a decision clear.

[BubbleBoy]

Sorry, I wasn't trying to attack everyone. Nothing wrong with giving advice. I'm only making sure that we remember who the real advice-giver is here. Maybe I worded my post poorly.

[TheKarazyvicePresidentRR]

@ YMT My friend is the pastor's son (the pastor invited me as well, I don't think that was clear.) and lives about 20 mins from my house. I'd see them at least every sunday, wednesday, (monday?/tuesday?) and thursday.

So far, everyone seems to be giving you advice on how you should decide what to do for yourself. My advice would be to find out what God wants you to do for Him and make your decision accordingly. Just sayin'.

I'll pray for you, too.

Don't worry about me, I know what ya meant(I am the king of poor phrasing). God is the best chess player ever he uses men too but I am praying hard on this to the point of tears because I have a "Father" thing with my brother/sister as much as they drive me up a wall.

@Underwood: There are MANY details to this story I didn't throw out there. If you'd like my full story just ask and I'll pm you about it. I am open about it, just didn't want to wall of text y'all. Anyone else who wants the full picture can message me as well.

@SS Yeah. I've learned going purely on my gut gets me in trouble, and going on advice does the same (See King Solomon's son King (Rehoboam?)

[RTSmaniac]

This prob sounds immature but i would say GO FOR IT! Its good to get out on your own. Buy your own dishes and TP whatnot. There are going to be alot harder walls to face besides this one. and if you ever need to talk to someone about them Josh- please know you can talk to me anytime! Good Luck bud! - and hey Im only about 9 hrs away if you need somewhere to stay- for real though.

[soul seeker]

@SS Yeah. I've learned going purely on my gut gets me in trouble, and going on advice does the same (See King Solomon's son King (Rehoboam?)

FWIW:  It was Rehoboam, and he did receive Godly advice from the Elders.  He just chose not to follow it.  He liked what the young guys had to say better (who also happened to puff up his ego in the process.)  So even in Rehoboam's case, Godly advice was to be had.*
    *I just didn't want you to think all advice was bad, even in Rehoboam's case.  God often sends people along our paths to help us in life.

[YourMathTeacher]

@ YMT My friend is the pastor's son (the pastor invited me as well, I don't think that was clear.) and lives about 20 mins from my house. I'd see them at least every sunday, wednesday, (monday?/tuesday?) and thursday.

So you're not really leaving anyway. 

[TheKarazyvicePresidentRR]

@ YMT My friend is the pastor's son (the pastor invited me as well, I don't think that was clear.) and lives about 20 mins from my house. I'd see them at least every sunday, wednesday, (monday?/tuesday?) and thursday.

So you're not really leaving anyway. 

Not really that far away but it is still a big thing because I won't be here to watch the kids.