Cactus Game Design Message Boards

Quote

Would you cuss in front of a girl/guy you are interested in?

I'm only interested in girls, but typically a girl who would have a problem with me cursing I wouldn't date. It's a sign of immaturity, in my eyes.

It's all up to situation. They're just words and carry no obvious physical damage. YMT: If your telling me Public schools hate cursing...if I walk into one now I'd bet as much money as I have I'd hear at least 5+ being used. It is Socially accepted
ButI also agree with YMT not to fall in the "More and more people thing" although I would still say there is no issue with cursing

maybe because the older group is used to their childhood being strictly against cursing where as the younger group is more seasoned to it(seasoned was the wrong word)

Kirk is 25 now?  

lol....I'm just kidding with you Matt, but I've already noticed the difference too and I have a pretty good theory on it.  And I'm sure it's not because of Caleb's theory:
  

maybe because the older group is used to their childhood being strictly against cursing where as the younger group is more seasoned to it(seasoned was the wrong word)

Here are some highlights of my theory:
1.  Like Prof U. stated earlier, the older crowd has more wisdom and life experiences which give more accuracy to the argument.
2.  The younger crowd (with a few exceptions) are trying to show how "mature" they are through being either adult-like (which they view cursing as) or "cool" (emulating stars of TV, music, & movies) which actually shows their immaturity IMO.
3.  A product of governing themselves (read: latch key) because of absentee parents (dual job or uninterested) which Dobson is saying is a growing trend.

As far as cursing being on the rise, I hate to break it to some of you but this is not a new phenomenon.  Where do you think the cliche' "cursing like a sailor" came from.  I've heard my fair share of curse words and yet my vocabulary always stood out for the lack of it.  It actually became a witnessing tool.  A couple people actually knew I was a Christian before every getting to know me because they knew my vocabulary was different.
   As far as the witness tool:  here is an example.  While working in a secular environment, several people got together to "bribe" me because in 2 years I had never cursed though they had seen me mad several times.  They offered $20 for a "minor" word, and $100 for the F-bomb. They were serious, and when I refused they wanted to know why.  I told them.
   Cursing is a heart condition.  What is in the heart comes out of the mouth.  Be mad at me if you want, but I would encourage some of you to take an inventory of your heart and motives.  Listen to the wisdom of your "elders" and not your peers.
Proverbs 22:17-19 (NIV)  
    Pay attention and listen to the sayings of the wise;
        apply your heart to what I teach,
    [18] for it is pleasing when you keep them in your heart
        and have all of them ready on your lips.
    [19] So that your trust may be in the Lord,
        I teach you today, even you.
Proverbs 2:12-15 (NIV)  
    Wisdom will save you from the ways of wicked men,
        from men whose words are perverse,
    [13] who leave the straight paths
        to walk in dark ways,
    [14] who delight in doing wrong
        and rejoice in the perverseness of evil,
    [15] whose paths are crooked
        and who are devious in their ways

While my opinions line up more with the "older crowd," (you'll notice that I was always arguing against a "NEVER curse" standpoint while trying to point out that it is only rarely advisable), I disagree with SS's analysis of why the split seems to be based on age. Sort of.

1.  Like Prof U. stated earlier, the older crowd has more wisdom and life experiences which give more accuracy to the argument.

While I agree that our elders are wiser and should be respected, there is also another factor coming into play. When they were our age, cursing was highly frowned upon and outrageous behavior. Today, not so much. Don't chalk it all up to lack of wisdom; it is largely a cultural thing too.

2.  The younger crowd (with a few exceptions) are trying to show how "mature" they are through being either adult-like (which they view cursing as) or "cool" (emulating stars of TV, music, & movies) which actually shows their immaturity IMO.

I agree 100%. Whenever I see little teeny-boppers or even college kids cursing up a storm, I just laugh my butt off.

3.  A product of governing themselves (read: latch key) because of absentee parents (dual job or uninterested) which Dobson is saying is a growing trend.

I agree that this kind of things leads to problems, but I don't really think it applies in this discussion because the people here seem to not fit that demographic for the most part. Colin thinks swearing is the bee's knees, and he's got one of the best dads I know. And he's still married to Colin's mother.

Cursing should be avoided, just as lying should be avoided. STRONGLY avoided. So should killing. However, if you are unable to kill in self-defense or in the defense of an innocent, you've taken it too far. The same sort of principle applies to cursing and lying. I saved someone's life once because I rarely curse, but am willing to when the need arises. He was standing in the soccer field a ways away from me, and I saw an adder gliding toward him. He did not. I yelled at him to move, and he asked why. So I yelled for him to move his ....... ... and he hopped to. He later told me that he knew I was super cereal because I never swear, and that's what made him move so fast.

That's probably a once-in-a-lifetime fluke occurrence of when it's wrong to not swear, but for those every once in a while, you need to be open to it. But if you're dropping sentence enhancers every third word or cursing when you get hurt, you're WAY over the fine line.

thats a different situation of morals

I saw an adder gliding toward him. He did not. I yelled at him to move, and he asked why. So I yelled for him to move his ....... ... and he hopped to. He later told me that he knew I was super cereal because I never swear, and that's what made him move so fast.

Classic example of a time cussing was NOT necessary.  If he didn't move at first and asked why, you could say, "Move your _____ ___!" or "I see a snake!"  The second would equally motivate someone to move quickly, it is faster to say, communicates more clearly what the danger is, and doesn't require cussing.

It's all up to situation.

Situation ethics ftl.

As a member of the "under 25" crowd, I can say that it is very easy, especially for my generation, to fall into the habit of profanity. I was raised to never cuss (under threat of soap in my mouth even) but after four years in a public high school, and three more at a public University, heightened exposure to profanity has definitely affected the way I speak. Whether it's to "fit in", for comedic effect, or for no conceivable reason at all, I have found myself using profanity far too often.

I don't believe that it is necessarily a sin, unless said in anger/spite, but I also believe it is dangerous to make a habit of it. I do remember a time when I said a swear word (albeit a "mild" one--found in the KJV) in front of an agnostic friend. He was surprised that I said that, because he knew my values, and didn't think I would say something like that. I quickly apologized. He said that it was no problem, as he uses far worse words than that regularly, but I said that it was important to me and I should not have said that.

All that said, I think it would be wise for everyone to remember to think carefully about what you speak. I recently read James, there's a lot of great stuff in there about the tongue. Whether or not using this or that word is a sin, cussing is never good for building others up, and it can obviously lead to division. I obviously can't tell everyone to avoid it completely without being a hypocrite, as I still struggle quite a bit. But I can say that when I hear other Christians using profanity like it's nothing, it doesn't help me at all.

maybe because the older group is used to their childhood being strictly against cursing where as the younger group is more seasoned to it(seasoned was the wrong word)

FWIW, my family cusses. That was why I had such a problem before I was saved. My brother shows the video as kind of an equalizer since he knows I don't cuss any more.

1 peter 2:16

Well, did God put any exceptions on lying?  Absolutely not!  Let me point you to a few Scriptures which will, unless you hold firm as can be to your view, change your mind for sure:



Proverbs 6:16-19

These six things doth the Lord hate: yea, seven are and abomination unto him:
A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood,
An heart that deviseth wicked imaginations, feet that be swift in running to mischief,
A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren.



So in the list of abominations to the Lord, two of them are lying-a lying tongue, and a false witness that speaks lies, which are really the same thing.  How about this one, when Jesus was talking about what defiles you, rather than what you eat:



Matthew 15:19-20

For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies:
These are the things which defile a man: but to eat with unwashen hands defileth not a man.



Here we see that false witness (which is lying, mind you) defiles a man, and I believe in another Gospel account it says that it makes you unacceptable to God.



I do not recall the verse, but in one Gospel account Jesus even says that lying is the Devil's language, and those who lie are talking in the language of their Father, the Devil.  Does that not convince you that lying, no matter what the circumstances, is a sin?  Even if you could lie to rescue a friend from danger or death, you shouldn't, because if God wanted to He could move Heaven and Earth to rescue them.

NotW666, didn't we just have this discussion? Why the necropost?

...I see that as alright. No one is perfect and we all make mistakes.

Acknowledging it as a mistake demonstrates that you actually do NOT think it is all right to curse.  What this implies instead is that it is wrong to curse, but all right to do the wrong thing because you're not thinking.

I would consider acting without thinking to be a potentially dangerous thing, and not something I would encourage or condone.  I understand that it happens but I'm not going to say that makes it all right.

I would be very careful about saying anything is "all right" just because it happens whether we like it or not.

Additionally, saying that it's okay to say in private something we would not say in public also betrays our convictions.  If it's not something you want someone to hear you say, it's not something you should be saying anyway, public or not.  The only difference is that you want other people to think you're not the kind of person who would talk that way, when in fact the way you talk alone says you are.  Character is who we are when no one else is watching us.

A lot of these arguments sound a lot less like saying these words are okay to use, and a lot more like rationalizing the use of words we know are inappropriate.

For the record a False Witness is a far more socially-destructive thing than a simple lie. I believe them both to be wrong, but they are fairly different.

False witness applies to the Biblical judicial system, in which two witness were required for the conviction of a crime. A False Witness could cause extreme social decline on top of the simple act of lying, causing such things as an unjust death penalty, etc.