Author Topic: I need some help.  (Read 1889 times)

Offline that one kid

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I need some help.
« on: July 11, 2010, 05:33:01 PM »
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Idk if this should be on here or prayer forum.

Well, I am 14 and I have several friends that are girls and just recently one told me that she likes me. Like, you know, a lot. I'm not sure what I should do and I think it would be a good idea to ask for advice before I do anything. I know that some of you are married and some of you are girls. Any advice?
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Offline adamfincher

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Re: I need some help.
« Reply #1 on: July 11, 2010, 05:48:36 PM »
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As your neighbor i saydon't date :)

Offline that one kid

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Re: I need some help.
« Reply #2 on: July 11, 2010, 05:49:00 PM »
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I wasn't planning on it.
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TheHobbit13

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Re: I need some help.
« Reply #3 on: July 11, 2010, 05:52:31 PM »
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First of all I would ask God, then see were he is trying to lead you.  Personally I think you should just say" I like you too, but I want to like you a lot more before we get too serioues. You see I just don't want to hurt you.... If it was all up to me I would date you in a heart beat. Can we be special friends?"




P.S I hope she mentioned your name when she said she liked you, your board name can be very confusing...


Offline CJSports

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Re: I need some help.
« Reply #4 on: July 11, 2010, 11:01:54 PM »
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Personally, If she does ask you out on a date say that I would rather get to know you better as a friend than go out.

I'm pretty close to your age so I'm just saying that at our age relationships of that source don't last to long if they aren't christian based on both sides. Good Luck and listen to god for the right choice. :)
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Offline Prof Underwood

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Re: I need some help.
« Reply #5 on: July 11, 2010, 11:16:34 PM »
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#1  I don't think dating when you are 14 is likely to be a good idea.  Hanging out with that person in a group with your friends is probably a much better idea.

#2  I am old-fashioned and think that the man should take the lead in a relationship.  Therefore, if a girl asked me out I would say no.  However, if I liked the girl, I would consider asking her out later.  Of course maybe I wouldn't be as interested anymore after finding out that she was the type of girl that would ask me out first.

#3  These are both general pieces of advice that are right in most situations.  However, I don't know your particular situation.  Therefore, it is likely that you will get better advice if you ask someone who knows you, this girl, and your life.  I would recommend a parent, youth leader, pastor, or teacher.  And as always, praying to God is a great idea.

Offline that one kid

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Re: I need some help.
« Reply #6 on: July 12, 2010, 12:27:02 AM »
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Well, she hasn't asked me out and I haven't talked to her since. Kinda busy. We are both Christans CJ. When did dating come into the mix? I didn't say anything about that. No offense, I appreciate the help. Thank you for the help guys!
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Offline CJSports

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Re: I need some help.
« Reply #7 on: July 12, 2010, 09:37:15 AM »
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I didn't say you were going out I said if she asked you out, and I'm happy that your both Christians because that might make the situation easier.
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Offline that one kid

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Re: I need some help.
« Reply #8 on: July 12, 2010, 02:07:44 PM »
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I didn't say you were going out I said if she asked you out, and I'm happy that your both Christians because that might make the situation easier.

No I was answering your question.
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Offline CJSports

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Re: I need some help.
« Reply #9 on: July 12, 2010, 02:16:42 PM »
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Ok, Good luck.
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Offline LadyNobody

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Re: I need some help.
« Reply #10 on: July 12, 2010, 02:41:35 PM »
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Well, I can say this much: I've been in her shoes. Luckily for me, it "worked out", at least, for almost two years, which is quite longer than your average relationship between young teenagers.

From my experience, my best advice is stay friends. Friendship is soooo important. While I carry no regrets, it would have probably been wiser if we had just continued the friendship and waited awhile before being 'in a relationship'.  

I won't say to not date her, however, I would be very, very, VERY cautious about what you say/do in this situation. Your words and actions say a lot, and the closer you get, the easier it is to hurt one another. Hurt feelings are not fun; believe me, I've spent the past six and a half months getting over the hurt caused by breaking up.

You've stated that you aren't looking to date right now, which is a sign of maturity. Most people 'our' age don't take dating seriously, and I'm glad to see that you do. Something I would highly recommend for you to do right now is set your physical boundaries, because it is much harder to set them after you've already started the dating process. Obviously, abstinence is key, but I'm talking more specifically about holding hands, snuggling, kissing, etc. I personally have chosen to abstain from kissing until I'm married, and it's one of the best choices I've ever made. Now, that may not be the right thing for you because everyone is different, but I would highly encourage you to figure out what your 'thing' is in regards to boundaries. Perhaps talk to your parents or pastor about it, but more importantly, pray about it. Ask God what's best for you in this area.

If you have any more specific questions or just want a female perspective on something, feel free to PM me. :)

~Britta        
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Offline YourMathTeacher

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Re: I need some help.
« Reply #11 on: July 12, 2010, 02:45:48 PM »
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If you have any more specific questions or just want a female perspective on something, feel free to PM me. :)

This is a tremendous blessing to offer to the young guys on this message board. God will reward your efforts.
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Offline that one kid

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Re: I need some help.
« Reply #12 on: July 12, 2010, 08:50:30 PM »
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Thank you for all of your help guys and Britta!
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Offline SomeKittens

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Re: I need some help.
« Reply #13 on: July 12, 2010, 11:31:00 PM »
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Well, almost all I would say has been said.  The one thing I'd add would be to check out courting as an alternative to dating.  If you're interested, PM me.
Mind not the ignorant fool on the other side of the screen!-BubbleBoy
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